Make Your Own Whipped Flavored Cream Cheese

I fundamentally disagree with this, but here's how to cook it
I've always been a purist when it comes to bagels, believing that flavored cream cheese is the work of the devil. There is only one acceptable dough that should be placed between the two halves of the everything bagel, and that is whipped cream cheese with whipped cream. I can't for the life of me understand why anyone on earth would think that the Bagel Sphere needed cream cheese options like chocolate chips or pumpkin seasoning, but it's no wonder there are such monsters walking around. Once upon a time, some evil demon in human form decided that bagels should have raisins in them, and people have been going crazy about it ever since. If someone is writing a dissertation on the slow decline of Western civilization, then a bagel with raisins should be the starting point.It was explained to me a few years ago that people outside of New York City don't have access to Temp Tee whipped cream cheeses. I never once thought about all those poor devils who will never really understand the beauty of a real bagel and will have to make do with what they have. They had to beat the cream cheese themselves and maybe add something to the mixer to hide the fact that their bagels were terrible. All they wanted was to belong and have a snack in the morning, like all of us lucky people.Then, at some point, flavored cream cheeses started popping up in bagel shops in New York-a kind of reverse migration. Almost every bagel shop in the five boroughs now has a wide selection of flavored cream cheese to decorate your bagel with, just like pineapple and ranch dressing appeared in our pizza. I don't necessarily agree with this, but I don't seem to have a choice in the matter. If we now live in a world where cleanliness doesn't suit our tastes, at least we can make smart decisions and practice making bagels safely.Put the cream cheese in a mixer and beat it well. Really, just go to the city. It will turn out delicious, easy and lush.Slice whatever you're going to add, nice and delicious. I'm not a fan of big chunks, but I've already messed you up enough, so it's up to you.Add this ingredient to the cream cheese and continue whipping. Then eat (and plan your move to a town that sells Temp Tee cream cheese).